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Urban legends III Andrew Carlssin, a time traveler |
There is a spanish version
URBAN LEGEND? According to the journals, federal investigators arrested in New York an enigmatic person in Wall Street who said to call himself Andrew Carlssin. He declared to be a time traveler from the year 2256, but investigators accused him of using privileged information (Insider-trading).
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LOS EXPERTOS DE EE.UU. NO ENCUENTRAN EXPLICACIÓN AL CASO DE ANDREW CARLSSIN, EL "VIAJERO DEL TIEMPO" QUE OBTUVO UNOS BENEFICIOS EN BOLSA IMPOSIBLES DE CONSEGUIR DE NINGÚN MODO HUMANO Fuentes de la Comisión de Seguridad y Cambio de Moneda de los EEUU confirman que Andrew Carlssin, de 44 años de edad, ofreció una extraña explicación al increíble exito conseguido en el mercado bursátil. No podemos confiar en las afirmaciones de este señor. Sinceramente, creemos que se trata de un lunático y de un mentiroso compulsivo Afirmó un miembro del SCM. Pero el hecho es que, partiendo de un capital inicial de 800$, este señor ha conseguido un margen de beneficios que supera los 350 millones de dólares. Cada inversión que ha realizado sufrió una inesperada e inexplicable subida de valor, lo cual no puede ser simple cuestión de suerte. La única manera por la que ha conseguido estos logros debe de haber sido a través de información ilegal. El señor Carlssin va a estar en una celda en la isla de Rikers hasta que acceda a confesar cuales fueron sus fuentes de información. El pasado año de desastres bursátiles dejaron a la mayoría de los inversores desesperados. Así que caundo Carlssin consguió que todas y cada una de las 126 operaciones de alto riesgo que realizó terminaran en un completo éxito de ganancias, atrajo sobre sí todas las miradas de los caza oportunidades de Wall Street. Si por ejemplo, los valores de una compañía subían debido a una unión o a una alianza de empresas tecnológicas que supuestamente debían ser acciones secretas, el Señor Carlssin lo sabía de antemano de alguna manera nos confirmó la fuente del SCM encargada de la investigación. Una vez puesto bajo investigación, los encargados de desvelar el misterio del caso se encontraron con algo que no esperaban: Una más que increíble confesión de más de cuatro horas de duración Carlssin declaró haber viajado en el tiempo, y proceder del futuro, concretamente, de una era 200 años posterior a la nuestra. Afirma también que en su época, es sabido que nuestra era fue una de las peores en lo que a caidas bursátiles se refiere, así que cualquiera con unos pocos conocimientos podría hacer aquí una fortuna. Era demasiado tentador como para resistirse, alegó Carlssin en su confesión grabada en video. Había planeado hacer que pareciera todo natural, ya sabe, perder un poco aquí y allí para que no pareciera demasiado perfecto. Pero parece que me han cogido con las manos en la masa. Las autoridades son muy reticentes, y afirman que las declaraciones del Viajero del tiempo no son más que patrañas. Pero lo que si es cierto es que el SCM admite no poder encontrar ningún registro sobre ningún Andrew Carlssin antes de Diciembre del 2002. El Weekly World News continuará investigado esta historia hasta que se resuelva.
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THE CASE OF ANDREW CARLSSIN A clandestine time traveler who took advantage of his privilege.
Dear professor Velmont: I would like to ask you if Andrew Carlssin is a time traveler. I say it because in New York, federal investigators arrested an enigmatic person in Wall Street accusing him of the use of privileged information (Insider-trading). The detainee declared to be a time traveler from the year 2256. I transcribe what was written by a newspaper about this person. It was published in Yahoo on March 19, 2003, in an article signed by Chad Kultgen: The story claims that the FBI have arrested a Wall Street wizard named Andrew Carlssin, on insider-trading charges. The FBI claims that with an initial investment of only $800, Carlssin built a personal fortune worth over $350 million in just two weeks! Authorities claim that every trade he made capitalized on unexpected business developments, which the FBI and the Security and Exchange Commission claim cannot be coincidence or luck. "The only way he could pull it off is with illegal inside information. He's going to sit in a jail cell on Rikers Island until he agrees to give up his sources," quotes a confidential SEC source. The source added, "If a company's stock rose due to a merger or technological breakthrough that was supposed to be secret, Mr. Carlssin somehow knew about it in advance." The past year of nose-diving stock prices has left most investors crying in their beer. So when Carlssin made a flurry of 126 high-risk trades and came out the winner every time, it raised the eyebrows of Wall Street watchdogs. The Accused Defence When investigators hauled Carlssin in for questioning, they got more than they bargained for: A mind-boggling four-hour confession. Sources at the Security and Exchange Commission confirm that 44-year-old Andrew Carlssin offered the bizarre explanation for his uncanny success in the stock market after being led off in handcuffs on January 28. In a bid for leniency, Andrew Carlssin has reportedly offered to divulge "historical facts" such as the whereabouts of Osama Bin Laden and a cure for AIDS. Carlssin declared that he had traveled back in time from over 200 years in the future, when it is common knowledge that our era experienced one of the worst stock plunges in history. Yet anyone armed with knowledge of the handful of stocks destined to go through the roof could make a fortune. "It was just too tempting to resist," Carlssin allegedly said in his videotaped confession. "I had planned to make it look natural, you know, lose a little here and there so it doesn't look too perfect. But I just got caught in the moment." Now all he wants is to be allowed to return to the future in his "time craft." However, he refuses to reveal the location of the machine or discuss how it works, supposedly out of fear the technology could "fall into the wrong hands." Officials are quite confident the "time-traveler's" claims are bogus. Yet the SEC source admits, "No one can find any record of any Andrew Carlssin existing anywhere before December 2002." "We don't believe this guy's story -- he's either a lunatic or a pathological liar," says an SEC insider.This article finishes here. The topic intrigues me so much and I beg you for quick answering. Edgard Z. ANSWER
Dear Edgard: Naturally, when I received your e-mail, the first thing I did was to meet professor Jorge Olguín, director of Grupo Elron, to make a telepathic session and transfer him your question to my personal guide: Ronald Hubbard.
Interlocutor: Concretely, then, is Andrew Carlssin a time traveler? Ron Hubbard: Yes, I confirm it to you. He is a time traveler. Interlocutor: But how is it possible he came from the year 2256, if time travels were not discovered up to 26th Century? Is there some kind of typographic mistake? Ron Hubbard: No, it is not a mistake. This person has been in touch with time travelers from the future in his time. The story is like this: The time travelers are not always beings of Light. Nobody said something like that. There are chemists and physicists whose Thetans are in the planes of Error 2 and 3. They are not perfect. There is an implicit order that says that time travelers should not contact with their past, they shouldn’t interact, except to correct mistakes in order to avoid alternative universes so disparate. Let us say that time travelers, and I believe the expression is quite illustrative, are "moderators" of history. They try to avoid too many things happen outside of the normal line. But they don’t always pay attention to these rules, just like Dominic Litio did with Nostradamus. Well, a time traveler from the 2500 has also contacted with Andrew Carlssin, in fact in the year 2256. Andrew was a student of quantum laws and related questions –we are speaking of your future-. They became very good friends and in a given time, because of a negligence of the time traveler, Andrew traveled to the last stage of the 20th Century which he loved to study very much. Interlocutor: Isn’t this case recent? Ron Hubbard: No, not recent. He traveled to 1999. Interlocutor: Is he detained at this moment? Ron Hubbard: Let us say that he is delayed in a federal prison. Interlocutor: How do you know all these things, Master? Ron Hubbard: Obviously, because I am communicating with his Thetan who is at this moment next to me advising me. Otherwise, I wouldn’t be able to know it. Interlocutor: And why don't they abduct him from the future, as they did with David Lang? Ron Hubbard: What they are looking for in this matter is that the civilization of 20th Century, in which we are, take him as an alienated person. It wouldn’t be wise if suddenly he disappears from the place in which he is detained, because speculations would begin and could modify facts that will change the traced history. This is exactly what they are trying to avoid with time travelers. We will see how this matter is solved. Interlocutor: I keep thinking Carlssin really earned a big fortune. Ron Hubbard: Right. And this behavior reveals how basic this person is, because a time traveler who returns to the past could make many more things than earning fortunes. He could help mankind and many other things. Interlocutor: Now, according to your explanation, Carlssin was not a real time traveler. Ron Hubbard: Literally he was, because he traveled in time. But I understand what you mean and the answer is no, because he was not prepared for time travels. Interlocutor: Could we say that he was an "opportunist"? Ron Hubbard: The term is valid. Interlocutor: Concretely, Carlssin stole the time machine of his friend and now that machine is hidden somewhere in this time. Is that so? Ron Hubbard: Yes, it is correct. Interlocutor: Is the time machine very big? Ron Hubbard: No, it is not very big. According to Carlssin’s Thetan it is something similar to an energy bubble which contains a seat with diverse mechanisms. It is an apparatus different from others, since there are several models. Interlocutor: what you say coincide with what Kronbus had clarified, in the sense that time travels were not discovered on Earth but until the year 2500. In the year 2256, from where Carlssin came, wasn’t some kind of clue about time machines? Ron Hubbard: No, not at all. The time traveler came from Carlssin’s future. Here this person’s Thetan is transmitting to me that if the FBI checked to his incarnated part, with one of those metal detectors used at the airports, they would discover a small device implanted inside his body from where he can control the time machine. Interlocutor: Let us see if I understood well: Carlssin has implanted in his body something like a microchip that allows him to control the time machine". Ron Hubbard: Correct. Interlocutor: And who implanted it to him? Ron Hubbard: Himself. It is something similar to those packages with hooks and these are incrusted with a simple click. Only moving his fingers over it, he can make visible or invisible the time machine. Interlocutor: Ah, I already understood!... Can we say that his Thetan should be quite upset with what his incarnated part did when he dragged his thetan to our time? Ron Hubbard: Of course! What were you expecting? Interlocutor: Well, before we conclude this topic about time travelers I wanted to ask about something I am quite confused. I asked you before, and later on I also asked to Kronbus, about Nostradamus, and both of you told me that he was a time traveler. But later you said he was not a time traveler because the real time traveler had been another one, Dominic Litio. How is that possible? Remember we discovered it by chance because a person sent us an e-mail requesting us explanations, since Michel de Nostredame, in his time, had a complete record of his birth, his marriage and even his offspring. Ron Hubbard: Nostradamus was a time traveler. I support it. Interlocutor: I don’t understand. Wasn’t the time traveler Dominic Litio? Ron Hubbard: Tell me a thing: Didn't Carlssin travel in time? Interlocutor: Yes, obviously. Ron Hubbard: Good, then he is a time traveler. The difference between this time traveler and Kronbus is that Kronbus is an official time traveler. But, on the other hand, the person that is now delayed is an unofficial time traveler. Interlocutor: What you want to tell me is that Nostradamus was also an unofficial time traveler? Ron Hubbard: Sure, you got the idea perfectly! Nostradamus contacted Dominic Litio, who was an official time traveler, and he told him many things of the future. But also he convinced him to travel in time and he has visited other periods of time. Nostradamus is a person of his time, he didn't come from the future. Interlocutor: Did Nostradamus travel in time with Dominic Litio? Ron Hubbard: No, he traveled alone, with the time machine that the real time traveler lent him. Interlocutor: Now I understood perfectly. His knowledge of the future, of his future, didn't come from him, but from Dominic Litio. Ron Hubbard: Correct, it came from the original time traveler. This is the right word. Interlocutor: But my question is still unanswered: what was the reason that all these things were not clarified from the start? Ron Hubbard: It was simply due to incidental reasons of the sessions. Don't forget that you don’t have enough time, especially this vessel, and we move on to another topic without finishing this one. Interlocutor: Did you know all of this? Ron Hubbard: Of course. Then, to put things clear, the original time traveler is the one from the time in which time traveling was discovered or after that. I repeat: or after that. If tomorrow a time traveler appears in front of you and he invites you to travel in time, you will also be a time traveler, although you won't be an original time traveler. Interlocutor: The topic was clarified totally. Thank you, Master. What you have just read is the literal transcription of the session, in its corresponding part. I hope your doubts have been clarified as well as mine.
Welcome to the club. A strong hug.
Horacio Velmont.
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